I’m pathetically shy, so I’m thinking of asking out this girl …

Looking For The Gaia Next Door I’m an Occupy girl, age 45, into eco-shamanism and planetary consciousness stuff. I’ve mostly dated engineers with a playful side who initially seemed open to my interests but quickly became resentful of them. My boyfriend of two years is different — easygoing and willing to expand his horizons. He…

Dim and Her I’m having a whirlwind romance with a man I met online on Thanksgiving. I moved across the country to live with him on Dec. 20,and we’re now building a life together. The problem is I have a high IQ (137), and he’s very unintelligent and illogical. It’s hard to have a good…

My boyfriend lacks romantic ambition. In our two years together, we’ve never gone out to dinner someplace I can wear a dress and heels, and he never brings me flowers or does anything for our anniversary or Valentine’s Day. I’ve suggested he pick out lingerie he’d like to see me in and shown him how…

  Shove thy Neighbor My commitment-phobic boyfriend of several years is also my neighbor. I resolved to make it work with him and then caught him on FriendFinder exchanging numerous messages with some woman in Tijuana. He claimed he was just being friendly. I asked if he’d correspond with a guy. He responded, “No. I’m…

Code Goo I’m a 33-year-old nurse in a five-month “friends with benefits” thing with a doctor co-worker. I am only 18 months out of an abusive 10-year relationship and wanted something fun and light. We get along well, but he rarely asks me ahead of time about getting together. I know he has a busy…

  On Crowd Nine The man I’ve been in a long-term on-and-off relationship with has started seeing someone else. He’s cagey about the details, but what’s really bothering me is she has no clue I exist. I’m tempted to write her an anonymous note, telling her that I was here first, have been here a…

A divorced male friend and I recently became “friends with benefits.” However, I’m not receiving the same, uh, level of benefits as he is. He isn’t giving me orgasms from intercourse, and his pleasuring of me is measured in seconds rather than minutes, despite my telling him that this is a problem. He also keeps…

The Cad Catalog Three years ago, I was divorced six weeks from a 22-year marriage when I got involved with a married co-worker and persuaded him to divorce his wife for me. He has been married five times and cheated on all of his wives. I have reason to believe he’s still having sex with…

Blister Wonderful I’m starting to have feelings for this guy friend I’ve been fooling around with, but I’m worried he isn’t feeling the same way. He’s stopped short of having full-blown intercourse with me, which I find odd, although I don’t want to have sex yet because I have genital herpes and I’m not ready…