The Issue Goes Beyond Jared

The Issue Goes Beyond Jared
Former Subway pitchman Jared Fogle leaves the Federal Courthouse in Indianapolis, Wednesday, Aug. 19, 2015 following a hearing on child-pornography charges. Fogle agreed to plead guilty to allegations that he paid for sex acts with minors and received child pornography in a case that destroyed his career at the sandwich-shop chain and could send him to prison for more than a decade. (AP Photo/Michael Conroy)

Former Subway pitchman Jared Fogle leaves the Federal Courthouse in Indianapolis, Wednesday, Aug. 19, 2015 following a hearing on child-pornography charges. Fogle agreed to plead guilty to allegations that he paid for sex acts with minors and received child pornography in a case that destroyed his career at the sandwich-shop chain and could send him to prison for more than a decade. (AP Photo/Michael Conroy)

Everyone knows Jared Fogle.

All one has to do is say the name and it is automatically connected with Turkey sandwiches and other “low calorie” sandwiches at Subway. He lost 245 pounds by doing nothing but eating Subway (and walking a lot, but they leave that part out). He gave hope to so many people struggling with obesity, so many people lined up at McDonald’s and remembering that commercial they saw at 2:30 a.m. about this dude that lost weight just eating sandwiches. They may order a Big Mac, two cheeseburgers, large french fries and an extra large Diet Coke (that was my ex-husband’s order, then he would complain in the mirror, but that’s another story).

Jared has been federally charged with using wealth to exploit children. His executive director for his childhood obesity charity, Tony Russell, sent Jared pornographic images of children as young as six. (Russell played the middle man, taking the fall first when the case exploded). Fogle (Jared) arranged to have sex with the minors in the pictures, including one as young as six. He has been ordered to pay 1.4 million dollars to 14 victims for restitution – counseling, etc.

What most people, though, don’t realize is that long after Jared goes into his jail cell and this case is replaced by another, these children – though they will receive counseling, etc., will live with this until they are six feet under. Their bodies won’t work normally. Pregnancies, when they DO meet someone to love them may be impossible. Scar tissue, an unseen and even unthought of thing by the public, will live inside of them, creating constant pelvic pain, and endless gynecologist visits where they will hear: “You’re normal. The pap is normal. There’s nothing wrong. It’s in your head.”

OB/GYN’s are the absolute WORST at hearing their patients, especially those who have been molested. The doctors do spend an inordinate amount of time writing down what the patient says, however, just sitting on their little swirly chairs and actually HEARING what their patients are saying is a rare quality. (I know this personally because I went through almost 27 years of this before finally I received a diagnosis of a disease known as Interstitial Cystitis and Pelvic Floor Dysfunction, which led to cancer, 37 surgeries, 67 hospitalizations and long-time friends accusing me of being a drug addict for their own convenience).

It’s a complicated story, and one I’ll save for later, but what is most important that people DO NOT know – there is no restitution for sexual abuse. Money can be spent, but memories cannot be dumped. Counseling, also, isn’t a one-time thing for these children/girls. It will be a lifetime process. Not every day, but when a new memory emerges (and it will). When a new nightmare sneaks into their brains at night, stealing Cinderella and the happy things kids dream about. When a new boyfriend is met and new trust has to be established.

What is worse, is when their friends who swear their undying friendship, or that boyfriend swears his undying love, lie and walk out of their lives just as they walked in unexpectedly. TRUST is the largest cost of what Jared stole from these girls/children. No matter how many times they try, trust will evade them for most of their lives, especially when that trust is broken by friends, parents, anyone close to the survivor of sexual abuse. They will see the world through glasses that convict every person guilty, not innocent in any way.

The biggest lesson of all of this is that we do not live in a world where a “fat” hero can be trusted with our children’s lives, even though Jared did something SO wonderful and became a non-fat hero. The world we live in is this: 1 in 4 million women have experienced violence by a spouse or boyfriend, and yes, rape can happen in marriage. 1 in 7 million children LIVE in that violence, watching their mothers get bashed around after dad or the new boyfriend has had a few beers.

Five hundred women are raped or sexually abused EVERY SINGLE DAY. One in five ‘tweens’ knows a victim of this violence, and one in five women are sexually assaulted in college. Three women every day are murdered. And women 20-24 are at the greatest risk of being violated by a boyfriend (or non-boyfriend they meet at a party).

Jared won’t know these statistics. Jared will remember only what he wants to, even if it’s sick because he had such a great time. Unfortunately, though, every time anyone looks at Subway, the public will always remember Jared. And not in the good way.

Categories: Commentary
Tags: Jared Fogle