It Chaps My Ass

It Chaps My Ass
Rachel Birdsell

Rachel Birdsell

Did you all catch the story in the news about the attack on 27-year-old, pregnant Michelle Wilkins? An assailant attacked her, and then cut the fetus from her body. Michelle survived, but the fetus didn’t. Now, let that sink in. Let the horrendousness of the attack into your mind. Try to imagine what it was like for Michelle. Try to imagine what you would feel like if it happened to you. Now imagine that some asshat in Colorado Springs just made it worse for you, because that’s what Republican state legislator, Gordon Klingenschmitt did. On his show,” Pray in Jesus Name,” Gordon claimed that Michelle’s attack was the “curse of God” for abortion.

Aw geez, Gordo! I don’t even know where to begin. How about I just jump in with this: what you said was so abhorrent, your fellow Republicans have denounced you, and kicked you off the house health, insurance, and environment committee. This is the party that revels in abhorrent rhetoric from its leaders. For the love of crazy little monkeys, this is the party of Santorum, Bachman, Palin, Cruz, Issa and Cotton, to name a few. And in the land where idiocy and hate speech is king, you’ve been deemed a little too over the top for them.

For some reason, Gordon has stayed off my radar, which probably hasn’t been a total loss. Since I’d never heard of him, I didn’t know anything about him. For instance, I didn’t have a clue he is a former chaplain, which is why he goes by “Dr. Chaps” on his show. So, the guy who referred to a woman having her fetus violently cut from her body as the “curse of God” used to be a man of the cloth. Le sigh, Gordon. On one level, there’s this horrible thought even entering your brain, and that level is bad. That level is a lard sandwich with a hair in it. But to actually let that kind of thinking escape your mouth? That level is so much worse. That level is a lard sandwich with a hair and raisins in it.

And “curse of God”? If the God you believe in is so vindictive as to cause a human being to attack another human being, and then forcibly cut her fetus out of her, then you might want to re-imagine a different God, because yours is kind of a jerk. Then again, it could be you that’s the jerk and trying to pawn it off on God.

But, even if I think Gordon is a jerk, and I do, I still don’t hate him. I hate what he said. I hate that people of his ilk are elected. I hate that because of being elected, their maddening, idiotic ramblings are played loudly across the globe. I hate that Michelle had to hear Gordon’s statement. And, I hate that people like Gordon who claim to follow Jesus Christ, do something that is most definitely un-Jesus-like. It’s also decidedly un-dude-like. In fact, it’s just not cool, man.

Rachel Birdsell is a freelance writer and artist. You can reach her at rabirdsell@gmail.com

Categories: Commentary