Commentary

Millenials Still Wanna Know What Love Is

Posted by Nick Brothers |
Nick Brothers, Managing Editor of The Free Weekly

Nick Brothers, Managing Editor of The Free Weekly

By Nick Brothers

On Saturday, I got to watch two of my high school friends profess their love and commit to each other at their beautiful wedding in Rogers. It was really touching. Most of the wedding party consisted of other high school friends I grew up with (I was the unofficial groomsman reception DJ, which I loved doing). During the procession, the wedding party walked up to some classic 2000s songs, such as “We Are Going to Be Friends” by The White Stripes, and “I Will Follow You Into The Dark” by Death Cab For Cutie. It was such a nostalgia bomb, and it evoked vivid memories of high school with my friends who were up on the altar.

All of it hit me then. Life: Part II just started. Adulthood, weddings and jobs are from here on out.

On Saturday, it thankfully was one of the better aspects of adulthood. I thought it was especially nice to see such a confident young couple be married. I have the utmost confidence in them that they’ll be a strong couple. I especially mean this despite in general, young American adults are getting married less and less.

For Americans ages 18 to 34 (“young”) only 28 percent are married, while 56 percent have never been married and would like to be someday, according to a 2013 Gallup poll. Only 9 percent said they do not plan on ever getting married.The national opinion on the importance of marriage has dropped from 76 percent in 2006 believing it should happen when two adults plan a life together or have a child out of wedlock to 64 percent in 2013.

Still, this all shows that Americans in general are pretty positive about marriages, but its importance has dropped. As a kicker, 26 percent of those polled said they haven’t married because they haven’t “found the right person,” and 22 percent said they’re “too young/not ready.”

We live in a time period where the Internet and Facebook can show us everything there is to learn about and see in the world. Because of this, I think fear of missing out has become much more pertinent. I think a lot of my peers would say they “aren’t looking for anything serious right now,”or “they’re open to whatever.” They’re easy answers. In some ways, it’s kind of how you have to be nowadays. It isn’t cool to say you’re seriously dating. That will freak out 90 percent of “the fish in the sea.” Because to a millennial, “forever” may seem kind of unsettling in an age of fear of missing out.

We aren’t growing up in a bubble like Northwest Arkansas anymore. My generation knows what’s out there now, and they want to make sure they’re making a good investment when it comes to a spouse (we can hope, anyway). Think about dating sites. They are love marketplaces. Users can get results from a personality test and have them broadcast out to a million users and they’ll get a list of potential matches based on the results. Everything is about maximizing potential, and y’know, maybe that’s the good thing about online dating. It shows that people are taking dating or marriage seriously.

Which brings me to my point. Watching my friends commit to each other for the rest of their lives on Saturday was so refreshing. Even if they’re in the minority, it makes me happy to see two young people find something as elusive as “love” in another person — especially from the same home town!

I’m a single dude who hasn’t experienced “true love” per se — more like infatuation — but I’m fairly certain that love is really more of an undertaking of dedicating a life-long understanding to a person. While in theory it isn’t very romantic, but I think the best marriages are probably the ones who operate like business partners for life, and they constantly work on their “love.” This all being gathered from talking with married couples and those about to be married.

Anywho, congratulations to my friends. They know who they are. Also, congratulations to all of you who have found their business partners for life or are soon to be in a “merger.” If that’s the case, best of luck to you.

Thanks for reading.

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