Commentary

Then Came Baby

Posted by tbaker |

“I think what this world needs is more parents like these two new dads, more parents who go out of their way to make sure they’re as ready as possible for parenthood…”

By Rachel Birdsell

I have a friend who just had a baby. Well, since my friend is a male, he obviously didn’t actually give birth, but the baby is definitely his. He was an awesome dad before there ever was a baby, even before there was a decision for the baby to enter the world. He was born to be a daddy.

There are some people who think he shouldn’t be allowed to be a father. They think that even though he loves his son and is a wonderful parent, he shouldn’t have a child. And the reason they think that is because my beautiful friend, who was born to be an amazing daddy, was also born gay.

It doesn’t matter to some people that my friend and his partner have been in a committed relationship for almost a decade. It doesn’t matter to some people that they made sure they were financially stable before parenting a baby brought into the world. They don’t care about how well the baby will be taken care of, and how much it will be loved. It doesn’t matter to them that my friend quit his job to be a full-time dad, or that my friend and his partner took parenting classes to prepare for their baby. Instead, they rant about how unnatural it is for two men to raise a baby, just because their naughty bits happen to look the same. Then they rant about how damaging it is to the child to be raised by two fathers.

Never mind that there isn’t any proof of their claims. Never mind that they’re oddly silent when a man and woman have a one night stand that ends up in a pregnancy. Never mind that there are thousands of children born every year into abusive households. Instead of fighting against straight couples having children they don’t want or that will be abused, neglected or worse, they rail against the rights of LGBT couples to adopt or have children.

My friend and his partner wanted a child so much that they went out of their way to make sure it happened. They had to find a surrogate mother; had to make sure every legal “i” was dotted. They’ve spent more time, effort and money on having a child than most straight couples do. In October, eager for their son to make his appearance, they made the trip from Chicago to Lee’s Summit, Mo., to wait three weeks for their son to be born.

I think what this world needs is more parents like these two new dads, more parents who go out of their way to make sure they’re as ready as possible for parenthood. More parents who are good moms and dads even before their child takes his or her first breath. Any child who grows up with two parents who loves them is fortunate, no matter the gender of his parents. So, congratulations, Charles and Doug. Little William is a lucky little boy to have two such amazing daddies.

Rachel Birdsell is a freelance writer and artist. You can drop her a line at rabirdsell@gmail.com.

4 Comments

Judith P. Silverman November 21, 2013 at 4:46 pm

Charles and Douglas have so much love to give William Nathan. I am so proud to be Douglas’s mom and see how he and Charles take care of their son. William Nathan is a lucky baby to have such wonderful, loving and caring parents.

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Kim November 23, 2013 at 9:25 pm

So wonderfully written! They really ARE amazing parents. I saw it when I met them. A child doesn’t know gender of parents. A child knows love. They absolutely no shortage of love for baby William. He is a blessed little boy to have such security for his life.

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